Smash: I Can’t. It’s Tech.

SMASH: 1.13 “Tech”

I wasn’t going to write about this episode of Smash. Why? Because it’s tech.

In all seriousness, I feel like we just saw a fake episode of Smash. Clearly, this wasn’t a real episode. It was just a spoof, and the real episode is coming. Maybe they didn’t show the real episode, you know, because it’s tech.

Here’s my explanation: Did anyone else feel like we missed an episode? How did we already get to tech? Was the show even finished? And why were we in Boston? I mean, I understand that they were doing a preview there because they explicitly said so, but shouldn’t that have been referenced in early episodes so we knew what the heck was going on? And what about all the drama of last week? Where did that go?

The episode opened with a happy little ditty as everyone excitedly got on a train to Boston, forgetting that Dev and Karen had a silly, yet sad musical number explaining everything wrong with their relationship. No one seemed to care that Ivy stole Karen’s solo…or that Rebecca stole it from Ivy. Heck, last time we saw them, they were still blocking that song — and now we’re in tech?

It just felt odd. And somewhat nonsensical.

Ivy discovered that Derek wasn’t faithful to her, suddenly remembering all the things she should be suspicious of — including things she didn’t see. Sure, she saw him touch the girl in the yellow dress at the party. Saw Karen’s risque performance. Saw him flirting with Rebecca. But how did she remember the kiss that went on behind closed doors?

And honestly, did that kiss even make sense? I felt like I was watching a movie from the ’80s where the two were yelling at each other and then kissing passionately (can someone tell me if this ever happens in real life?).

Meanwhile, Karen is pushing aside Dev for reasons beyond my comprehension. Oh wait, no, I get it: It’s tech. Seriously, though, Karen, what is up?! The sad part is that “tech” really didn’t sound like a flimsy excuse, you know, something covering up the real reason behind her not wanting to discuss their relationship. I think she generally thought she couldn’t do anything else because it was tech.

Which is opposite of what Sam and Tom thought, since apparently tech allowed enough time for them to go out for a very long evening with Sam’s family (which, by the way, was one of the better parts of the episode).

The real plot here (other than the many goings-on in the bedroom or dressing room) was that Michael might be coming back to the show. Now I’m not excited to see Michael return, since his story with Julia was the weakest of the series, but I did enjoy seeing her family rally behind her, basically telling her that the show is part of her life and she can’t turn her back on it. That was nice. But I’m quite fearful of whatever is going to happen next.

Much like this whole Ivy/Dev development. Now, is it just me, or is it odd that Dev would be buying drinks for another girl, right after he kissed one and told his girlfriend he didn’t want anyone other than her? Plus, I’m sorry, Dev, but Karen’s talked about Ivy enough. You’d think that you’d want to stay away from anyone with that name, especially if you happen to be in a bar where her company is staying.

Clearly, in this episode, reason went out the window (with the exception of spineless Tom and poor Julia, who I actually understood her point of view) and the characters we’ve grown to know were weird doppelgangers of their former selves. Either way, there’s one thing you can take away from this episode:

When someone asks you to do something, just say, “I can’t. It’s Tech.” Karen, you’re an idiot.