After this, we all need plausible deniability

GOSSIP GIRL: 4.05 “Goodbye, Columbia”

Umm what. is. this. crap. This story line is getting way out of hand. Fake STDs, stolen phones, stolen cabs, stolen bottom halves of Juliet’s dresses…?

Many of the characters were actually involved in the same plot line this week! Hurrah! So let me see if I can sum up this doozy of an episode. Juliet starts a rumor that Serena has an STD, and then withholds sex from Nate until he gets tested, which makes Serena angry at Nate for not believing that she’s clean. Nate needs his best girlfriend Dan to come to health services with him, which leads Vanessa to think that the test is for Dan, even though he swears he didn’t sleep with Serena, and makes Vanessa insecure enough to let Juliet talk her into stealing Serena’s phone at the party of the week, which gives Juliet the opportunity to email one of Serena’s professors with an offer to trade sex for grades and then plant the phone in Vanessa’s bag. So as a result, everyone loves Juliet for “exposing” Vanessa, and everyone hates Vanessa. And scene!

As far as Blair and Chuck go, I must say: yawn and double yawn. Blair breaks up Chuck and “his future”, so he takes her TA job away? If the writers weren’t completely sabotaging Chuck’s character, he would be on a plane to Prague to get Eva back, not messing with Blair on the lamest of levels. He is definitely stepping up his game by bringing back Jenny, however. Her Blair smackdown will be better than whatever mewling story line these two had this week.

I am still loving Dan and Nate’s courtship, more specifically how Dan had to make sure the lingerie wasn’t for Nate to wear and how Dan was jonesing for a hug. Hehe.

And now, two rants. Juliet is allegedly worried that Nate has an imaginary STD from Serena? When they “met” he was working his way through Chuck’s black book of prostitutes. I would be more worried about them than some little Gossip Girl post. Also, not sure what the show is saying when Blair gets the assistant position with a prominent businesswoman by getting her a man? What does that mean exactly? Girl power through promises of hot men? Really? They couldn’t have Blair propose an insightful business plan instead of dangling a lawyer in front of her? Meh.

Next week: Jenny! No Vanessa!

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