If I could raspberry ‘Happy Town,’ I would

HAPPY TOWN: 1.03 “Polly Want a Crack at Her”

There is no suspense anymore. Actually, there kinda never was. They should have worked on that. And there’s really very little plot anymore. And finally, other than Dave’s assumption that Friddle was the Magic Man, how does he even fit into all of this? I thought we’d see someone else disappear, for goodness’ sake!…

I’m going to sit through tonight’s episode, sure, but whether I’ll make it to the burn-off in June, well, I just don’t know. If only they had played to their strengths a little more. Where’s Amy Acker and Steven Weber on the screen when you need them?

Those were some quick quotes from my last review of Happy Town. Well, I got one thing that I wanted: someone else disappeared. Of course, we took away one of the key people that I was watching the show for.

Seriously, why is Amy Acker always the one who’s kidnapped. Will the rest of her appearances in the show be like the ones on Drive? Just a still picture on a “Missing” poster?

I should say one thing about this episode: At 10:39 pm, I looked at the clock and said, “Holy crap. We’ve watched forty minutes and nothing’s happened?!” It’s true. Nothing happened until the final five minutes. And sorry, those five minutes might not keep my attention until June. Especially because they got rid of one of my favorite actors.

First, the whole Henley storyline was just stupid. I didn’t care if she hooked up with “Greggy,” as we discovered that he was. And the minute I saw her pull that hammer out of her bag, I knew he’d see it. After all, that’s why I said, outloud, “Why is she doing that while he’s just lying there? He’ll see it.” What a moron.

Second, I’m really fed up with Tommy and Dave. Just arrest him already. Clearly, you think what Dave did was wrong, and even if you didn’t, he killed a man. Take him in. Stop protecting him. The problem is, the show didn’t establish a strong enough bond with Tommy and Dave (in its episode and a half before outing him as the killer) to make Tommy’s protection warranted. Bah. Just lose it.

And then there’s Georgia’s dad and his boyfriend. Boy, did this bore me. I really didn’t care about any of these characters, except maybe Georgia, who just kept reiterating that her dad didn’t hit her and that just got tired. Dude, I know her dad didn’t do it, and I didn’t want to believe her. Bah.

I don’t know what to say. The last episode moved way too fast for its own good and this episode moved way too slow. I feel like we were in a slow episode 5 or 17 in a 22-episode season–you know, one of those filler episodes. It didn’t warrant the surprise ending, and it certainly needed to move faster to grab a third episode slot. Bah.

I might have to have a whole separate post on “How to fix Happy Town.” Maybe on another day. Sigh.

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